I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
