Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
