is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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