smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
