We named our party play list daddy issues
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
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