He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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