Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
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