I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
