And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
