I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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