How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Randomize