you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
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He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
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Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.