I like to think it a success when the cops are called
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
