Don't make out with my wife yet
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
