If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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