no, he came in my armpit
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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