Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
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