so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
