don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
