yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
