Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
