grandma shit on top of the toilet
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
You dont lie about slip and slides
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
