what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Dick very happy bro
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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