also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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