Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
there is puke in my bra ... again
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
