Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
