He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
