69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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