Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
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