I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
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