I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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