I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
