that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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