Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
look no pants
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
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Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
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You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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