? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
and you fell through a lawn chair
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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