Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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