is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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