I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Did you just see the Batmobile???
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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