What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Boobs are out for the taking
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Randomize
