belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
