i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
you had me at cake vodka
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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