UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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