Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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