Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
