either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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