do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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