It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
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