I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
