We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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