just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Ladies don't puke and tell
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize