I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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