is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
