I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
