So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
