I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
